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Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I Learned a New Fashion Accessory Today

There's this building not too far from where I live that has gone through different ownership recently. I think it used to be a shoe repair shop, then maybe it sold guitars, and then it was vacant...I can't really remember. Or maybe I'm confusing it with something else. Who knows, I didn't really NOTICE it until recently because as of late it's acquired new ownership and a new business and a graffiti-art sign. I think it says "Uptown Grillz" or "Urban Grillz". I don't know which, I really wasn't paying attention. At first I thought it is a new bar...grilled food, even though it seemed really small. Maybe it was takeout food. Then I thought maybe they sell custom grills, you know, for your car. Then I saw something on the news about how some 7-year-old sprog swallowed some rhinestone grillz (almost a Darwin award for this sprog who got his genes from his mommee who bought him such a brilliant gift (at a freakin' FLEA MARKET no less....ewwww...used...yelch)). So I decided to Google "Grillz" and now I know what they sell there.

Holy Crap. Fashion has hit an all time low in beauty and comfort. For someone who had to wear braces for over two years as a teenager and a retainer for even more years after that, why the hell would anyone want to have that crap in their mouth? Metal in your mouth is the most unpleasant feeling. But what the hell is wrong with a culture that on one hand cannot tolerate natural discoloration/yellowing or any slight imperfection that no one would give a second thought to in other Western civilized cultures ("English Teeth" simply do not phase me one way or another...they're just natural teeth), and on the other hand creates this sort of fashion abomination?

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4 Comments:

Blogger Dawn Marie said...

Grillz are nasty! I don't get it either. They are just the ugliest things in the world.


Bleck!

10:26 AM  
Blogger Stan said...

Wow, am I out of touch... I knew I hated 'Bling Culture' but I didn't know it was all this bad. That's really gross.

I want my teeth to look like animal teeth - yellowed chipped and worn with age and use.

I think people are crazy to want teeth that shine and reflect strange lights.... It's all very sinister and unnatural.

4:29 PM  
Blogger Ann said...

Animal teeth?!? I just want my teeth to look human! Not grillzed like some Jaws Bond Villain, not Barbie Doll plastic white beyond the whitest white, just human!

Anyway, necks and wrists and earlobes and fingers are much more comfortable places to put metal and stones, or even bling if that's your thing.

4:36 PM  
Blogger Stan said...

Yes, 'human animal teeth' - not some sinister white sparkling things that look like something out of a schizothrenic's waking vision of teeth belonging to divine beings.

If I happen live long enough that they start to look "grilzeld" then at least I can use them to frighten small children away.

Just as long as my teeth look like they belong to a mortal being - such as I am.

7:25 PM  

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