ornamentalillness: I Hate The Food Network or Whatever It Is.

I'm sitting in the Dentist's Office waiting for Stan...just in case I have to drive him home. They have a TV on. I never thought I'd say this, but gimme the traditional dentist office elevator muzak. This TV is provoking me to want to commit horrible crimes. It's on the food network or something. The happy homemaker suburban woman was bad enough (at least it wasn't Rachel Ray) but now they have a southern woman on cooking "ribs and kraut" (barf) speaking in a really thick southern accent and she keeps saying "y'aowl". I want to strangle her, but she's just a digitally projected image and sound. I hate her. I don't know her, but I hate her. I hate her. She is really irritating. Fortunately I brought my laptop along...I got some work done, but I have to do some creative copywriting and it is impossible to do that because I need to think and this is really interfering with my ability to do anything but very simple tasks. Anthony Bourdain would really hate these shows. Can someone switch this to MSNBC? I think the receptionists like this stuff. This is why I work at home.

Labels: This Boring Life

7 Comments:

Stan said...: I guess you were suffering much more than I could be said to from a teeth cleaning. The cleaning went very well and the dental asst. was young enough to be an offspring (not that I want any), it was one of the most skillful cleanings I've ever had. I didn't get poked in the gums even once, and I don't think I bleed at all. I usually end up bleeding a little with a cleaning, but I'm impressed.

They used the strange water pressure machine that makes a high pitched noise. On the inside of my back left teeth the machine noise sounded like it was coming into my right ear from the outside of my head. It was very weird.

I think I did suffer much less than you did with the food TV.; 7:44 PM
Ann said...: As irritating as the noise generated from dental equipment can be, there's no way it could compare to cackle-voiced Y'AOWL! She kept interjecting it when there wasn't even a need to address anyone as "you all." It was like a horny cat with Tourette's. Y'AOWL!; 7:52 PM
Ann said...: That's not to say there aren't any irritating Northerners either...and I've heard others with Southern accents who sound very comforting. It's not the place you're from, it's the VOICE and how it's projected. Just want to make that clear.; 9:41 PM
Lavender said...: lmao!!! I think I know who you are talking about!

Give me Good Eats any day, though, and I will be hapy. I have a secret crush on that sciencey food guy!; 12:46 PM
Ann said...: I like Anthony Bourdain (No Reservations) and Andrew Zimmern (Bizarre Foods)...especially Anthony, as his sensibilities and cultural likes and dislikes are very much like mine--Anthony's fave seafood is Uni (Sea Urchin) as is mine. Both those shows are more about the cultures they visit, be they American cities that saw their heydey in the mid-century, or exotic southeast Asian cultures. Although Andrew's does seem to be a little "gosh-gee-whiz, this is bizarre" at times, Anthony's narrative is especially done well.; 4:12 PM
Jim said...: "It was like a horny cat with Tourette's. Y'AOWL!"

hahahahaha That was the most comical - yet accurate - description I've heard yet. I liked the first show I saw with Paula Deen. The smell of the roast beef she was cooking came through the tv set. But like EVERY other person on the Food Network, you can only take so much.

Just passin thru... thanks for making my day!; 8:49 AM
Ann said...: Thank you, Jim!; 7:20 PM

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