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..::Previous entry: "I just feel like screaming right now"::.. ..::Main Index::.. ..::Next entry: "More Thoughts on the Disaster"::.. 09:04:2005 Entry: "Ann : DREAMs of my former lives"DREAMs of my former livesI dreamt I was still working at "Pinko's." I can't remember exactly what I was doing, but some counter worker came up to me and asked me if I could find the floppy disk (remember those?) that contained a customer's file with some brochure on it because she wanted some revisions. I didn't know where anything was, and the counter worker said that if we couldn't find her file, because it has been a long time, perhaps we could redo her brochure? I thought for a minute and then wondered if we were even supposed to be doing brochures anymore due to some weird rules put in place by our series of transient managers like Evil Drunken Bert or Cokehead Mike. I then said something like "I can't believe I've been working here for 10 years." I have no idea where I got the 10 years number. Had I stayed working for "Pinko's," the 10 years would make the year in the dream 1995. If I was still working for "Pinko's," then I'd have been working for them for 20 years. There was also something in the dream about me starting college or grad school and moving to a new city, but I was all alone, without Stan. I had a dream a few nights ago that I forgot to write down. It had something in it with "Depressions" and the Production Manager was being sarcastic and said to me, "thank you for calling in to let us know you wouldn't be coming." Well, no, I didn't call in because I didn't work there. But in the dream, I think I said, "but I DID call in." And whoever took the message didn't tell those in charge. I think that happened once somewhere, I called in sick and could only reach a coworker, and the higherups were never informed that I had called in sick, so naturally that reflects bad on me when in fact it was their problem that the coworker never informed them or that they couldn't be bothered to take my call. Damn, I hate former job dreams. I think they're worse than those school anxiety dreams where you haven't been to class for several weeks and there's a test, and you figure maybe if you just don't go to class at all, they'll drop you from the roster and you'll never be academically penalized because they'll think it's just a clerical mistake that you were signed up in the first place, but you're absolutely dreading to see your grade report at the end of the semester anyway. Come to think of it, I think I had one of those dreams last night too.
9 Comments Jobs and College courses are both awful times to live through. You are a survivor, and I hope your dreams stop. I guess I have job dreams sometimes about iky co-workers, but I'm glad I don't have the college class dreams anymore. Posted by Stan @ 09:04:2005:06:47 PM CST Maybe I have those dreams because I *don't* go to college anymore and don't have a job that I have to call in to when I'm sick. If I ever stop doing what I'm doing now, will I have nightmares about the internet? Posted by Ann @ 09:04:2005:06:52 PM CST I think the internet itself might not be a problem, but what about having nightmares about some of the people you've experienced? Also, about the part with you moving to Wisconsin by yourself - do you think it was fate that you ended up living here? Posted by Stan @ 09:04:2005:06:56 PM CST I think it is hard to dream about people you haven't actually met in the flesh. And that is definitely a good thing in this case. I don't know about fate. Is she a muse? Posted by Ann @ 09:04:2005:07:10 PM CST Fate - as in you would end up moving here (within the scope of...) whether we met or ever became a pair or not. Fate - as in you would have moved here with or with out me? Posted by Stan @ 09:04:2005:07:16 PM CST Yeah, I know what you were trying to say. I just don't know if I believe in fate or not. Posted by Ann @ 09:04:2005:07:19 PM CST Most people think of fate as being something sinister - like perhaps - a spider who would rather eat us for a meal than let us live our own life in peace. I do believe in fate, and I think it doesn't matter whether we believe in fate or not. We can say anything about fate we can imagine and it simply doesn't matter to our fates. Instead of thinking of fate as being like a muse or a spider - I think of fate as being like the spider's web. We may never notice it until we are bumping up aginst fate. Perhaps it is dangerous not to notice fate or perhaps it doesn't matter what we see. I think if we could see fate it would be as beautiful and delicate as a spiders web. I have to admit that I don't know whether I beleive in fate or not, but I want to keep my mind open to the possibility. If there is such a thing as fate I would want to be able to see such an interesting thing - someday. Posted by Stan @ 09:04:2005:08:01 PM CST I guess if you want to get philosophical, fate exists because regardless of what happens to you, you can say it's fate. How can you deny it? Do you know what I'm getting at? You can't deny it's fate that we moved here. It's fate I'm here. It's fate you're here. It's fate that my parents moved to CO. It's fate that your (adopt.) parents never left CO. Try and deny it's not fate. You can't. Am I nuts? Therefore, fate, however you define it, exists. Posted by Ann @ 09:04:2005:08:07 PM CST Sounds paradoxial or something like that, and I think you are right that it becomes impossible to deny it. I guess I feel somewhat muddled in my own beliefs --- would want to stay away from 'Dogma' anyway. Posted by Stan @ 09:04:2005:08:12 PM CST By Ann @ 09:08 AM CST:09:04:05 ..::Link::.. |
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