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Saturday, January 3, 2004

Uncomfortable Holiday Party DREAM

I should've written this dream down sooner so I could've remembered more. Oh well.

For some odd reason, I was going to some holiday party with Stan's biological mom. Stan was not with me, he was with Tim somewhere. His mom and I were walking up some stairs to a house...sort of a brick and frame cape cod style. IRL, his mom is keeping Stan a secret from everyone except her mother and her own kids. Supposedly it would harm her business if the community knew. Well, whatever. Anyway, this seeped into my dream, so as we're walking up the steps, I ask her, "Who am I?" I know that sounds sort of cryptic, but in my dream I intended it to mean, "what is my supposed relationship to you that I can tell these people at the party in case they ask?" His mom thought about it for a while--perhaps she was confused by my question. I asked again, "Am I your webdesigner? No, that wouldn't work too well," I knew I would have to answer to someone else's page design. As we were standing on the steps, I saw a man in a car pull up who looked sort of like pictures of her brother that I've seen. I forgot what we settled on as to "who I am". We go into the house, and immediately, I lose track of Stan's mom. I sit down at a table with a whole bunch of people I don't know. Fortunately, they are ignoring me. Then this person walks into the room who looks a lot like Stan, except he/she has wavier hair, in a very female style. I ask, "Stanley Starbuck, is that you?" I wanted it to appear, in case it was Stan, that my relationship to him was rather distant and formal, which is why I didn't say, "Stan, is that you?" The person looked at me and ignored me. Evidentally, it wasn't Stan. As the party progressed, each time I looked at that person I realized he (he was now definitely a He) was mutating in looks, becoming more masuline, hair turning darker and shorter, and also looking less like Stan and more ugly in sort of a working class Tony sort of way. I also noticed he had an identical twin with him. Everyone in the party had a northeastcoast accent, and I heard talk of things that sounded slightly, um...Mafiosaesque. I think I then said something to the twin guys apologizing for mistaking him/them for someone else before. They then started talking to me and asking me questions. I was afraid they were going to ask me who Stanley is. Then they made jokes that I had a weird way of trying to pick of guys. I explained I was not looking to pick them up, that I genuinely mistook them for someone. They then said there was some sort of dating service I could use. I told them I wasn't interested and that I was married. They started laughing and going "whoooooah, she's MARRIED!" I then wondered what if they asked me who I was married to, who would I say, as I couldn't then say I was married to Stan, as surely a wife would know what her own husband looks like! (At least in real life, maybe not in a dream...heh) I then thought I would say I was married to Tim, and in case they tried to contact him, I hoped he would vouch for my alibi.

Posted by Ann on 01/03/04@05:32 PM CST ..::Link::..Whisper or Scream?

Friday, January 2, 2004

The Moment of Truth...

...will come later today. My g4 has been in "the hospital" for over two weeks. All they needed to do was repair or replace the HD, install 512 of RAM plus Panther. Two weeks. Yeah, whatever. I know Holidays were involved, and no, I couldn't pick it up on Wednesday when it was actually done because Stan had the van at work (the other van is in the car hospital). But still, taking two weeks to get my computer back after they said (on the 17th of December) that I could have it back in 48-72 hours is a little excessive, no?

When I get it back, I will see whether I actually love or hate Panther. I will see if I will have to spend all weekend re-installing every piece of software I have (this is no fun at all, not at all).

But at least I won't have that worrisome click loop that I couldn't get out of without restarting. That was always most scary, and is why I had to finally take action to get it replaced.This upgrade will be my "new" computer, since I can't really afford, monetarily or space-wise, to get a new one. I hope it will be a good investment.

I have been using this ibook constantly for 2 weeks straight. The only place I can really use it "comfortably" is on the futon, and that is hardly comfortable. My shoulder is in pain, as I have it propped up (the ibook, not my shoulder) on a box and resting on the futon's arm so that I don't have to rest it on my lap (which is a real pain when you have to keep setting it aside to take care of a dog or something)

The old van had to get a new brake pad or something (Stan? help) which is why I have no car either while Stan takes the new one to work. After we got the new red van, I hardly ever drove the old gold one. Stan used that one strictly for work and to do errands by himself. But one day I decided to drive it home (it's a long story, I won't go into the details involved) and wouldn't you know, the van sensed someone else besides Stan was driving it and decided to act up for me by making a large "clunk clunk" sound, as if something fell off of the bottom of it. I looked in my rear view mirror and didn't see anything. When I got home, Stan looked at it and couldn't find anything either. But months later, he experienced some braking problems. We suspect the noise I heard was the brake pad falling off.

That van used to act up on me before, back in the old days when my main car was my black Monza. It would stall on me, leaving me stranded various places. After I gave up the Monza to Stan, and took over the van for my own, it didn't act up on me anymore. I think it was jealous.

I had a dream last night that I looked out the window and it was snowing tremendously, a really bad blizzard. I was worried that Stan would be stranded at work. But I saw blue sky through the clouds. I thought that was odd.

Posted by Ann on 01/02/04@10:11 AM CST ..::Link::..A Whisper Inside.

Tuesday, December 30, 2003

Monstera Deliciosa

My Swiss Cheese plant has its first hole!

We started it from seed like 2 or 3 years ago...forgot which. The first leaves were just generic "philodendron/heart-shaped." I worried it wasn't a true "Swiss Cheese" plant, but just noticed the hole yesterday. What a thrill!

I have a small, vining version of it to, in a hanging basket. But it came with holes.

Holes in plants always remind me of The Beatles Yellow Submarine. And my first real bad pot experience. Hard to explain.

I was getting Cs in my college Freshman Drawing class 24 years ago. This was strange to me...I'd been A art student in high school. We'd been working in black and white materials the entire semester. Then we went over to the University Horticultural building to draw color. This was the pivotal assingment...where the true artists start to excel, and the average students--who had been doing superbly in the first part of the semster--started floundering. It was too challenging for most of the students, but I picked a vining Monstera Deliciosa (because of the holes) to draw in oranges and blues. That's when I stopped getting Cs and started getting As.

That time of life I was listening to The Wall too. Don't know if that's relevant or not.

Can still sometimes feel those holes going through me if I get in the right frame of mind.

Posted by Ann on 12/30/03@06:44 PM CST ..::Link::..3 Screamers.
By Ann @ 05:32 PM CST:01:03:04 ..::Link::..Whisper or Scream?