The Dictionary

Who/what are all these freaky people/names/places/words and why does she dream and write about them?

Why do I dream about them? That is the big mystery. Why does anyone dream about people, places and things? This dictionary is not to serve as a form of interpretation, as no one, including the dreamer, can really accurately interpret a dream. It is instead a reference guide that aquaints the reader with what these things are, and what they mean to me, Ann, in my conscious state to provide a glimpse of what they could possibly mean in my unconscious state.

Some of the words aren't things I dream about, but I may frequently insert them in a passage. They're very colloquial to say the least. It's Ann and Stan speak.

Excuse the back and forth of first to third person...I do that a lot and am aware of it, but because I am so not anal about it, I'm not going to be like my mom or my former employers and edit it. I think the switching back and forth adds a dimension of embellished mental precariousness, hence the name of this domain.

I have tried to list everything I've had in a dream or that I mention frequently, although this list is not all inclusive. If I have forgotten things and if I remember them later, they will be added. Everything is listed in alphabetical order.


Adam: Adam J. Cabrini, a character Ann created in 1980/1981. He is of Italian descent. Ann was initially interested in Stan from a physical standpoint because he had certain facial similarities to her character that she hadn't noticed before. At that time, Stan did not know his nationalities as he was adopted. Soon after, he found out he was part Italian. In 1997, after he found his biological mother, he found out he was 1/4 Sicilian.

AFAIK: As Far As I Know

Ann: And that would be Ann.

As It Happens: A Canadian Broadcasting radio show that reviews the events of the day but is interspersed with offbeat stories. Broadcast at 5 AM on Wisconsin Public Radio.

Attic: When I dream about going into an attic, I think it means I am going into a higher state of being, or perhaps my superego, my ethereal, cerebral self.

Baby Phone: Our cellphone. It needs to be cared for like a baby; taken with us when we leave the house, plugged in at night. It is also of dimunitive size as opposed to a regular landline phone (which we no longer have).

Baraboo: Town 40 miles or so Northwest of Madison. Contains some clown museum or something frightening. Near Devil's Lake Park, also contains some pretty creepy houses that appear in my dreams. The name must be spoken in an accent to rhyme with "Caribou" from "Dieter's Dream" (see Dieter.)

Barrett, Syd: Former leader of Pink Floyd. Back in the 1960s gorgeous insane cult figure Syd experimented very heavily with psychedellics which caused his mental and emotional decline, leading to his ouster from the group. I've often wondered why there's never been a fictional movie at least loosely based on Syd, (ala "Velvet Goldmine" being based on David Bowie). Especially when you think that now he is living his life no longer as Syd, but as Roger Barrett (his given name), and the fact that he has influenced Roger Waters' songwriting and subject matter...the whole Roger name thing...much could be done with that in sort of a artistic mystery sort of way.

Basement: When I dream about going into a basement, I think it means I am going into my lower state of being, or perhaps my id, my base, animal self.

Beatles, The: The Beatles. Duh.

Big Move, The: When Ann and Stan moved from Colorado to Wisconsin, they cleared out a lot of their possessions beforehand, mainly, their vinyl (kids, vinyl means record albums. This was before CDs. Are large collection could become quite burdonsome when moving), something they regret to this day, not the move per se, but getting rid of all that vinyl and the sounds and memories that went along with them.

Bill: One of Ann and Stan's oldest friends, Bill is the (dare I say) leader of Biota. We've known eachother since 1985. Bill lives in Colorado. We see more of him than anyone else when we visit Colorado. In 1985, Bill saw Ann's artwork in a local show and tried to look her up in the phone book, which is sooooo romantic, alas, he only found her parents instead, as she was living with/serious with Stan at the time (which is probably what is preventing this journal from being authored by Ann and Bill). Get it? I've said too much already.

Bitch: Rather than a general term, this would probably be a certain specific person (see DW), but for reasons I don't want to mention their name (see Someone I Used to Know) I just refer to them as Bitch. Taken from the SNL skit, "Stalk Talk" with Christopher Walken.

Bohler's Hole: A dump Stan and I lived in and gothed out when we first moved in together in 1983. Rent was $230 a month, all utilities (except phone) included. Can ya beat it? Unfortunately, we had these deadheads that stayed up all night above us, so we had to move into the basement to sleep, which had mice in the walls. It was hell. The landlady's (can I say landbitch?) last name was Bohler.

Bowie, David: Eclectic musical chameleon encompassing many genres and art forms: from Dylanesque whimsical English folk, cabaret, glam, rock and roll, soul, art rock, new wave, but always ahead of his time, multi-talented and, influenced by as much as he in turn influences. Ann has ALWAYS (since she heard "Changes" on the radio in 1973) been into Bowie. Always.

Busses: Before I bought a car in 1983, it was my only form of transportation. Because my dad wouldn't go to Racine with my mom and I in the summer when I was young, and because my mom didn't drive, we had to rely solely on busess after we got off the plane. I also rode the bus a lot when I moved to Madison and went to grad school at the UW because parking on campus or even in a ramp off campus was extremely expensive.

Butterflies: Stan and I raise butterflies in the summer. We gather their eggs/larvae and make sure they make it into adulthood, protecting them from predators. I frequently dream about them.

Caligula: Ann and Stan's male tabby cat, 1998-. We got him a few days after Vladimir died. Bootcake Fruitcake. Butchy.

Carl: Originally created by Ann in 1978, and ironically one of her lesser developed characters at the time, Carl has now symbolized a solitary (usually swarthy, lanky) guy in a pickup truck or jeep (see Deke and Delbert) in Ann and Stan speak. If you were lost in the woods, it would be better to be rescued by Carl than Deke and Delbert, however it would be best if a National Forest Rescue Team found you instead. Carl camouflages himself well in his environment, he comes in many different varieties. A Wisconsin Carl is different than a Colorado Carl which is different than a Southern Carl, whereas Deke and Delbert are always Deke and Delbert. Carl tends to be more mountainous/forested/swamp marsh whereas Deke and Delbert tend to be more out in the open...grassland and plains.

Chemistry Stockroom, The: Where Ann's father managed (1971-1998) and where Ann worked a student job (1981-1984 and shortly in 1985). It was in a basement and sort of creepy. Where I realized that there really is a universe of difference between the mind of an artist and a mind of a scientiest, regardless of what popular culture may have you believe in the closeness of the two.

Cindy: A generic character Ann and Stan created in the early 80s that symbolized sorority girls.

Cobain, Kurt: Leader of Nirvana, died early April, 1994. Mass cultural consensus says he committed suicide, some say Courtney Love had him offed, whatever, it's all part of the rock and roll mythology. Back in 1994 his death especially saddenned me because it made me think how I had neglected music ever since we sold back our vinyl in the late 80s to pursue some bogus dream of becoming responsible adults and getting graduate degrees. How bogus was that? B-O-G-U-S. After that, we started buying cds, or at least until money and jobs ran out in 1996. Never leave your music.

Craig: A generic character Ann and Stan created in the early 80s that symbolized fraternity boys.

Dale: Artist friend of Ann and Stan's that lives in Fort Collins, Colorado. We met in 1987.

Deke and Delbert: Two redneck guys, usually with fair hair, usually seen together in a pickup truck. Created by Ann and Stan, synthesized from real people. (See Carl). If you are a person of color, a misfit or anything outside the box of rednecks, you don't want to be found in the woods by Deke and Delbert. Think Quentin Tarantino's Zed and Maynard from "Pulp Fiction."

Depp, Johnny: One darn good looking actor, but other than that he holds no special mystical cache as say a musician would. One of those "special guest star" people.

Dieter: One of Ann and Stan's favorite SNL characters. Portrayed by Mike Meyers, Dieter is a German avant garde existentialist talk show host who dances at the end of his show to a band called Sprockets, which is probably based on Kraftwerk. Stan swears that the Sprockets theme is culled from an electronic musical sequence from Stanley Kubrick's "A Clockwork Orange." One of the best ever SNL skits was "Dieter's Dream" where Dieter is met with a bunch of Freudian Images, like his mother, his father, and a Caribou (not to be confused with Baraboo).

Disney Witch: A woman who is bent on ruthlessly acquiring power, often occult power, usually hurting others in the process or at least sleeping her way to the top for her own vain gain and glory. They are usually obsessed with status and money and all the trappings of (financial) success as well. They also have to be the center of attention constantly, and sometimes seem rather immature and childlike, however this is usally just an act. Stan swears I came up with the term, and I swear he did. Unfortunately, we have both personally known too many DWs in our lifetime, however, as we grow older and wiser we're learning what to avoid. A DW will tell you what's wrong with your husband while she's trying to get him in bed with her and kill him all at the same time. Avoid! Avoid! DWs have a real hard time keeping a sustained relationship with a man. They will also have a hard time with women if you are not a fellow DW. Examples of well-known Disney Witches: Courtney Love (I wouldn't have thought so in 1994, but yeah, now I know she is), Elizabeth Taylor, Katherine Harris, Leona Helmsley, Martha Stewart, Immelda Marcos.

DW: See Disney Witch.

Durhay: A real stupid guy, usually a hick/redneck.

Eno, Brian: God. Sorry, that's an old joke. One of Ann and Stan's favorite musicians (or non-musician as Eno used to refer to himself). Originally in Roxy Music, later venturing into ambient music, Ann had a prejudice against all things Eno for AGES (without really knowing what he sounded like...silly girl) until she saw the light in 1999 after viewing Velvet Goldmine ("Who are all those great songs by? You're KIDDING me!"). She's never been the same since. Stan has always liked Eno, and even has sometimes (unintentionally) resembled him...blue eyes, high forehead/receding hairline, blond hair, short. Young Eno was HOT!

Ferry, Bryan: Lead singer and songwriter for Roxy Music. I've been into Roxy Music a lot lately too. Stan got into them back in 1983. He even made a t-shirt with Bryan Ferry on it, although I don't think he wants to admit it/can't remember. You did, Stan, I remember.

Fort Collins: A college town in Northern Colorado where Ann spent 17 years and Stan spent 10. Ann moved there with her parents when she was 10. Stan moved there to go to Colorado State. They both left in 1989 to go to the University of Wisconsin in Madison.

Goth: Short for Gothic. A (usually young) person who rejects upbeat contemporary suntanned pop culture, instead opting for a darker Victorian-era persona, black clothes, palid (London) complexion, dark eyeliner, dark-sounding music. In my day, kids, your Uncle Stan and Aunt Ann were proto-goths, meaning IN 1983 IN COLORADO NO ONE KNEW WTF WE WERE AND THERE WAS NO NAME FOR IT. We listened to The Damned, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Bauhaus, Sisters of Mercy, etc. Goth fashion was originally born in The Batcave club in London in the early 80s, which was descended from punk fashion but not as disshevelled, nor was it as flashy as the style-conscious New Romantics. It was an embrace of The Dark Side. Rent "The Hunger" with David Bowie and see Bauhaus perform "Bela Lugosi's Dead" to get a glimpse. It just seemed like a natural progression for me at the time as I was listening to that genre of music, but the real reason I started wearing black had nothing to do with music. I was a fan of a student and his art, John Offerman, who was a few years ahead of me in art school at the time. He wore black everyday...maybe he thought he was Johnny Cash, I don't know. I started doing it in hopes John would notice me, not because I liked him *that* way, but I just wanted him to notice me, and then Stan started doing it. Then in the 90s Goth was big. SNL had skits about it. Soon Goth will be mainstream, heck, they already have some fabric detergent that promises to keep your blacks from turning grey. At the point of mainstreaming Goth, I think I will do like Sarah Vowell on This American Life and name myself Becky and wear pastel pink. (you must hear that show). I still wear black a lot, not because I'm still goth (once a goth always a goth? I don't know), but because it's cheaper and you have to buy fewer clothes. Some proto-proto-goths: Alice Cooper, Morticia Addams, Johnny Cash, Bela Lugosi, Edgar Allen Poe.

Grant Street: The place where Ann and Stan rented together the longest in Colorado (4 years), after Peterson Street and before their move to Wisconsin. It was a darling little house. They planted many flowers and plantlings that were unfortuntely destroyed by subsequent owners. It was there they got their two cats, the late Natasha and Vladimir.

Hieronymus: Ann and Stan's Pug dog, 1990-. We got Hieronymus in 1991, Ann's first dog. Chucky.

Houses: I dream a lot about houses, frequently old, decaying and crumbling ones, sometimes gigantic, huge ones. I think houses are people, and going from floor to floor means you are travelling in your soul or psyche.

IRL: In Real Life

Kingsfoot: A gallery in Madison where I had a solo show in the summer of 2002.

Kinks, The: One of Ann's favorite musical bands of all time, Ann was a huge Kinks fan from about 1978-1982 or so. She saw them three times in concert, but missed them in concert the first time due to a fallout with a friend. Unfortunately, Ann's entire humongous Kinks Kollection got sold back when they did the vinyl cleansing routine before The Big Move.

Lamya and Russ: Some of Ann and Stan's oldest friends, we met Lamya in art school. They live in Colorado. We try to see them when we come out to Colorado.

Leon: A character I created in 1981/1982. Soulmate of Sharleen, a character Stan created around the same time. As the legend goes, in the other world, Leon was Stan's roommate. He was a horticulture student or something. Leon was my guide into goth.

Liverpool: Not the home of The Beatles, Liverpool, New York is where Ann lived from age 7-10.

Madison: Wisconsin's Capital, this is also the home of the University of Wisconsin and city where Ann and Stan currently reside.

Mark: A boyfriend/boy friend of Ann's from high school. They went out a little after high school and a little in college. He was an artist too, sort of competed with Ann as "the class artist" in high school. Pops up in a dream now and then.

Matt: Tim's former roommate. Matt was pretty much a slob. Nice guy, (although took advantage of Tim some financially) not too bright, whacky, un-completed artistic ideas.

Mex: Short for Carmex, it can mean any sort of lip balm.

Moxie: Our neighbor's youngest dog...some sort of mix.

Mountains: Frequently appearing in my dreams, they are something from a place where I used to live.

Mulberry Street: See Bohler's Hole.

Natasha: Ann and Stan's female calico cat, 1985-2001. Natasha was Stan's first cat. She died of a combination of kidney failure and cancer on Labor Day. It was excruciatingly painful to watch her die.

Nex: Short for Kleenex, it can mean any sort of facial tissue.

Orchard Hill: The place Stan worked in Madison from 1989-1996. It was a very "uninstitutional" sort of institution for people with mental problems and IQs below 70 or so. To me, I thought it was an ideal place for these people to be. The state and its board of directors thought otherwise.

Pansy Rocker: From the movie "Velvet Goldmine" it is usually in reference to our gay little dog, Plato. You need to see Plato and his antics to truly understand.

Pat: A multi-talented artist/writer friend in Fort Collins, Colorado and author of "Moving Target", Pat is a published writer. We met her in 1987.

Persephone: Ann and Stan's female grey cat, 1991-. Miss Peezalot. P-Phone. Twidge. Twidgit.

Pete Townsend: Lead guitarist/songwriter/leader of The Who. I always thought as a teenager when I got old I'd look like Pete Townsend because I had a dysmorphic image of my nose being much larger than it actually is. I don't think I look much like him at all, really.

Peterson Street: The place where Stan and Ann lived after Bohler's Hole. It was shortlived--6 months--the landlords were evil. The house itself had so much potential and had the best plant room in front. It was a bittersweet stay.

Pink Floyd: Legendary progressive rock band who were always more about ideas, concepts and being musicians rather than rawk starz. Currently in heavy rotation in our CD players, Stan used to have PF ("Piper at the Gates of Dawn" through "Animals") on vinyl and played a few album sides for Ann when they were going out, back in the early 1980s. Ann always liked Pink Floyd, but never *really* got into them (in the 1970s/80s) because she got into the punk thing which led her to abort much of her love of older stuff, more or less with a few twists, however she always loved what she heard, missed it, and now has gone back in time to re-discover them, buying her first copy of Dark Side of the Moon at age 41. (That's either really lame or really hardcore devotion, I haven't decided which). Maybe I can appreciate them more now that I'm older.

Planes: I frequently dream a plane is falling out the sky, or that I'm on one and it's about to crash. I haven't flown since 1982 since it's too expensive (if you count having to board the dogs, renting a car, etc.).

Plato: Ann and Stan's Boston Terrier, 1996-. Spazmo snugglebunny. Pappit. Bunky.

Pop, Iggy: Leader of the late 60s band The Stooges and one of the Godfathers of Punk, Ann's been into Iggy and The Stooges since 1982 or so. One time back in 1982, Ann bleached Stan's hair and he looked just like one of those early 70s photos of a bleached Iggy.

Racine: Racine, Wisconsin, is where Ann was born and where she would visit her grandmother almost every summer up until the age of 19.

Raynham: Raynham, Massachusetts, where Ann lived from age 5-7.

Reed, Lou: Singer (not according to Bill, however :-p)/Songwriter and Leader of the 60s band The Velvet Underground and one of the Godfathers of Punk, Ann's been into Lou Reed since 1982 or so. One time when Stan and Ann were first going out, Stan said something to her regarding "a special place where you go to meet Lou Reed" meaning a mental place where she escapes into her music and mind, I guess.

Seinfeld: Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer from the TV sitcom now in syndication and one of the few pieces of mass-popular culture that Ann and Stan actually enjoy too, generally preferring the more off-beat. Seinfeldisms have become a part of our vernacular, e.g., "I dance like Elaine" or "that is very George of you."

SNL: Saturday Night Live

Someone I Used to Know: As it sounds, this could be a small number of people. For whatever reason, I'm chosing not to mention their real name, however usually it's someone we are consciously trying to avoid because of problems in the past.

South Bend: South Bend, Indiana, where Ann lived from age 1-5.

Special Guest Star: A celebrity or famous person that appears for some unknown reason in a dream. E.G., if I had a dream about Syd Barrett, he would not be a special guest star because he is someone on my mind lately, however, if um...lemme think... I had a dream with Alex Trebeck (wtf?), It would be a Special Guest Star dream because that is a celebrity I never think about (thank God) (unless I'm visiting my parent's house and they're watching Jeopardy in the middle of the afternoon...urgh). This term was coined by Tim, "a special guest star dream."

Stan: Telegram Stan, he's Ann's Main Man! Ann and Stan met in art school in 1980, became friends in 1981, "went out" in 1982, moved in together at the end of 1983, married in 1988. Stan and I are psychically connected and share many interests, more, I think, than other couples.

Stan's Sister(s): Stan actually has four sisters: Marcia (whom he grew up with and is also adopted) and his three half-sisters who he met recently, Jamie (on his bio-mom's side), and Sara and Adria (on his bio-dad's side).

Sunday: Our neighbor's first dog. Black Lab/Blue Heeler/? unknown mix.

This American Life: Nationally Syndicated Public Radio show originating in Chicago and played around noon on Sundays on WPR. Always good for some alternative insight into people. Hosted by Ira Glass, favorite storytellers are Sarah Vowell and David Sedaris. Ambient Eno is frequently used as background music.

Tim: One of Ann and Stan's best friends. He lives in the same town we do, Madison, WI. Stan met Tim at their former jobs at Orchard Hill. We probably see Tim more than we do anyone else (with the exception of the people Stan works with, but they're not too relevant to the dream world). Every woman needs a close gay male friend.

Tom Clark Show: An issues-based call-in talk program on Wisconsin Public Radio from 6-9 AM. It is often during this program that I have some strange early-morning dreams.

Twin Peaks: Best damn piece of TV ever. Twin Peaks viewing is a mandatory yearly ritual in late winter/early spring in the Ann and Stan house. Series ran about one and a half seasons. TV would never air something so intense again. Much of our vocabulary, vernacular and way we undersand the world is derived from Twin Peaks. In Halloween of 1992, Stan went as Killer Bob (a striking resemblence!) and Ann went as Laura Palmer wrapped in Plastic (another amazing resemblence).

Velvet Goldmine: Best damn rock and roll movie ever. Despite David Bowie's objections to them using any of his music (probably because the movie's subject was based on him and wasn't exactly a flattering picture of the 80s incarnation), it nonetheless has a superb (best ever) soundtrack with songs by Brian Eno, Roxy Music, T-Rex, Iggy and The Stooges and more. Gorgeous guys, a gorgeous time, it makes you remember all the *good* things about being a young teenager in the 1970s (remember the smell of vinyl as you opened a record?), none of the bad.

Vladimir: Ann and Stan's male tabby cat, 1986-1998. He died unexpectedly of unknown stomach/internal ailments on November 29.

We: Contrary to popular opinion, this doesn't mean me and the friends inside my head. It usually means Stan and I, but is easier to write.

WPR: Wisconsin Public Radio. When I listen to the radio, this is what I listen to.

WTF: What The F*c*?

Yuma: A small town on the eastern plains of Colorado where Stan grew up. Lots of Dekes and Delberts live in Yuma. Durhays too. Some Carls.


Latest Achives (April 2006–Present)

Four Years of old entries before this journal blew up the second time (April 2002–April 2006)

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